384,395 plays

retroactiveeurydices:

oxheadandhorsefacearedead:

retroactiveeurydices:

koalatea:

i dont need a boyfriend i need 12 million dollars and a donut 

12 million dollars can be used to obtain many donuts.

explain how

money can be exchanged for goods and services

nipplebutt:

basedgosh:

a national hero


look at his little shoes

nipplebutt:

basedgosh:

a national hero

look at his little shoes

stacksbreadup:

This deadass the funniest tweet ever.

stacksbreadup:

This deadass the funniest tweet ever.

How To Date:

reallybigsword:

spreadlovenotlies:

Step 1- Buy her pizza.

Step 2- Make her cum.

Step 3 - watch your weak ass relationship fall apart after six weeks when you realize you both have the personalities of an unwashed cheese grater

deersatan:

"dinner’s ready!"

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pixiecasey:



glamour tips i have read that can also be applied to the loch ness monster:

stay hydrated
be elusive
avoid a harsh flash
try to get plenty of exercise
play hard to get
be aware of lighting
elongate the neck
eat plenty of fish
grow old gracefully
keep an air of mystery
a true lady reveals nothing

pixiecasey:

glamour tips i have read that can also be applied to the loch ness monster:
  • stay hydrated
  • be elusive
  • avoid a harsh flash
  • try to get plenty of exercise
  • play hard to get
  • be aware of lighting
  • elongate the neck
  • eat plenty of fish
  • grow old gracefully
  • keep an air of mystery
  • a true lady reveals nothing

tubesock:

princehomo:

do people actually go on dates or is that just on tv

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